Astrology, Sex & Sensuality
Astrology birth charts are like nudes for astrology nerds. In our astrology groups some people get up birth charts and literally pose the question : smash or pass? Rolls eyes
I mean… it’s a giggle but in truth let me preface this WHOLE post by saying if you really want to invest in a long term relationship with someone, looking at their charts before like 6 months in can be a little bit shady, in my opinion. (unless they ask you). Us freaky astrologers can look at a chart and there isn’t much we cannot see.
On the other hand, it’s also why astrology can be really FUN when you do wanna get a little bit down and dirty, or simply attract someone by appealing to their desires. I think it’s really critical I also mention that if you are trying to adapt your behaviour in a way which is literally to please someone and attract them in, it’s not always sustainable. Remember that at the end of the day, the mask must come off when authenticity shines through, your partner could feel like they have been mis-sold something, and that’s inevitably a road running to a bad end.
It’s cool to look at astrology, sex and sensuality and if there is a base compatibility in a relationship and it is secure, this can really help open up discussions and help you to gently say or do things that appeal to the other person’s planetary placements, which is cool.
Astrology and sex is a vast topic and through many threads of astrology I have found that varying astrologers look at different elements and places in the chart to identify sex. Commonly the 8th house, 5th house and 12th house. Some threads of astrology have also looked at the 7th house, the house of union and partnership.
For the purposes of this blog post to keep it from being a massive long lecture, I am going to look at mars and venus placements.
To get your mars or venus placements you can look here : https://cafeastrology.com/venussignstables.html for your venus or here: https://cafeastrology.com/marssignstables.html for your mars signs. You can also look at your natal birth chart via astro.com as instructed in some of my astro classroom tutorials.
There are MANY elements to attraction, such as composite and synastry which play a big roll in compatibility. You can book a relationship reading with me if you’re interested in a more comprehensive look at a relationship.
Mars & What It Means
Mars in astrology is literally a yang, fire forward moving energy. In vedic astrology, mars is actually one of the most spiritual in the essence that it is not concerned with anything other than the path to God. Procreation is here, but not necessarily sensuality. Mars is like the driving force of instinctual human desires and the sign it is placed in is HOW it drives forward. Mars in Aries is like the spark of an ignition that burns out quickly but mars in taurus would be a slow, enduring, measured drive forward. In sex, I see mars as the ignition of how sexual energy begins and how the sex is happening or executed between 2 or 3 or 4 or 5 people (whatever floats your boat hehe)
Venus & What It Means
Venus represents many things in astrology, love, attraction, value, listening, the type of partner we like (more for men) and even legacy. In a sexual context, venus is sensuality and how we need to be valued by our partner in order to feel sexual. There is lots to venus, but for the sake of streamlining this down, let’s keep it at that.
Venus/Mars in Aries
Mars here is fast, direct, short burst of energy. Think about McGregor vs Khabib. Both with mars in aries, BUT khabib has his retrograde. McGregor is more like a fast, sharp battering, whereas Khabib is a slow, but sharp, hard mauling. Slightly different energies but still sharp, hot, forward moving. Mars in aries in the bedroom loves to be chasing, initiating, spotaneous. It does, then thinks. A mars in aries person can often melt when they see innocence and purity and will move towards it like a magnet. The like to conquer (mars is god of war after all!). The can be aggresive and impulsive and it may seem as though their desire appears out of nowhere (similar for many fire signs). Aries rules the head so they are probably likely to maul your hair and you’ll look like you’ve had 10 rounds with mike tyson but in like… 5 minutes (oh yes, they’ll be short, sharp and too the point). Foreplay is not really likely for this sign and they can be very selfish, but not in an inconsiderate way, its just their nature to thing, ME > FORWARD > DO > THINK AFTER.
With venus in aries they can be quick to love, then quick to forget. They tend to be extremely passionate about someone but their love can waiver to be enduring unless there is some strong synastry such as a pluto opposition/mars opposition/square. This way there is still a need to conquer something which will likely keep them chasing!
Try giving your mars/venus in aries person something to conquer in a very innocent ‘come and get me kind of way’. Think of being totally receptive and opposite but not cold and aloof. This is usually magical to aries mars or venus.
Mars/Venus in Taurus
I love this placement (mainly as it’s my own! ha!). The difficulty with mars in taurus is that sexually, these are one of the few signs that need slow, steady, long and enduring. They can have quick sex but they are likely to be wanting a marathon vs a sprint. Think of taurus as a slow, steady walk in nature. Nice sights, smells, sounds. Taurus is the sensory experience. A mars in taurus person will feel uncomfortable if there’s bad smells, bad lighting and will respond well to a slow build up. Lots of touching, kissing and slow persuing or seduction will really turn this sign on. They don’t care for fantastical sex positions, but they will do it with some persuasion. For mars in taurus the experience is in the connection, the touching, the sense pleasures and they are definitely in it for the long game. I’d say that these are the most enduring but lazy sexual signs.
Venus in taurus appreciate an earthy partner who makes them feel safe and secure. Risk, discomfort or being rushed will piss a taurus off. They are attracted to people of substance and thus it’s rare venus in taurus have flings or meaningless sexual encounters but would perhaps have a sexual partner with no strings that they’d get stuck into for years at a time. Taurus is the long game, no frills, comfort, sense pleasure and beauty. They aren’t superficial, they just love to accumulate and hold onto beautiful things, even if it doesn’t serve them in the long run.
Try attracting a venus in taurus or mars in taurus by slowly moving towards sex with perhaps a walk in nature, running them a bath with essential oils, massaging them, candles, dinner with more focus on quality flavours vs volume of food and most importantly, make sure they feel safe and secure.
Venus/Mars in Gemini
So I mean… this placement is difficult in my opinion. Gemini is duality, yang air, mobile, constantly changing, curiosity. Gemini is constantly curious about different experiences and often doesn’t settle. The good news is that once gemini has experienced many things it can generally settle in one place. Gemini is not inherently disloyal, it simply wishes to experience everything. They can get a little caught up in ‘what if’ and ‘buts’ around sex and partners, but that it only their explorative mental nature.
Two words : ROLE PLAY. Geminis love to dress up and experiement. Things are driven much by the intellect rather than primal, instinctual desires.
Mars in gemini people are restless in their actions, often appearing scattered and ungrounded. In sex they would love to talk about sex, talk even during sex probably, the whole experience can be one where they are wanting to explore and experience. It must be fun and certainly the same thing over and over would not appeal to a gemini unless they have strong taurus or earth. It needs to be explorative and lighthearted, they’ll try everything once.
Gemini rules the shoulders, so expect them to get a little turned on by nice shoulders ( wierd i know). A venus in gemini will appreciate nice shoulders and arms for sure.
I know gender and that is all problematic these days so don’t shoot me for anything I mess up here… Try turning gemini on by having a bardot top (women) or having some strong shoulders (men). Be open to any type of sexual experience and talk about sexual desires or experiences, this will turn them on (unless they have strong moon placements which suggest different). Maybe take them hiking or have an intense intellectual discussion about something. For geminis you need to gave a good set of brains on you for sure.
Mars/Venus in Cancer
Ok, I wanna preface by saying, I have nothing against cancers BUT mars is not really happy here. Think of mars’ fiery sexuality and cancer’s feminine, soft, watery, nurturing nature. Essentially, mars in cancer feels like the energy of having sex with your mum… sorry but girl’s gotta be real. To turn a mars in cancer on, simply make them feel safe and nurtured. Similar to taurus, make a nourishing space but it’s more likely they’ll get on better at home. Keep it simple and safe.
What they lack in fire they make up for in sweetness, romantic stuff and moodiness in good nature. If they’re moody, leave them too it. But you can give them a sense of power over you, and actually, this can really turn a cancer mars/venus on. For some cancers the idea of creating a baby can really turn them on, cancer is mother after all.
Try Sentimental touches romantic talk and even experiement with soothing soft singing to them. Cancers love the breasts (mother) so get your baps out, bab. If anyone has these placements, more insight please in comments below!!
Mars/Venus in Leo
i was in a long term relationship with someone with this placement. They had some really conflicting sun and moon but in essence they loved to be a superstar in the bedroom. I have mars in taurus and venus in cap so sometimes the leo mars or venus can feel a little… false?
Leo is the king, superstar, centre of the universe BUT they are also powerful, playful, loving, really devoted and loyal. They want to be adored and made to feel like they are important to you. They love to feel like a god or goddess and the centre of attention, this really turns them on and makes them feel important. They actually can be quite jealous and possessive lovers when they find someone they truly value, but this can work. As someone with strong scorpio and taurus the idea of being posessed is a real turn on. Leo people don’t generally do well with two stars in a relationship. They want to be seen as important and in a certain way BUT venus in leo also are attracted to those in the limelight.
The trick here is to bolster their ego and make them important in public whilst also being powerful in your own realm of interest but not dominating or taking away from their limelight. Certainly you need to appear to be something of importance and desire but always make them sure that they are slightly more important than you without self depricating.
Turn on your venus/mars leo by bolstering their ego whilst throwing in equal measure of self confidence, love and affection. BUT PLEASE no false flattery for these people. Just let them know they are the most important person in the room/bedroom because of what they’re doing and giving to you. Bingo.
Mars/Venus in Virgo
Virgos have a very healthy and systematic approach to sex. They may even see it as a clinical, biological process in which they must engage in as a system of relationship. It’s likely for them to be very giving in the bedroom as they are quite literally the servents of the zodiac. They’re unlikely to enjoy sex or be turned on if the environment is messy and the partner scruffy. They are likely to want to shower before and after sex.
They are not, however, virginal. They are simply picky with lovers. They can be very fascinated by the act of sex and very often they can be nice on the outside, naughty on the inside. They tend to enjoy voyeurism and observing others. Something they can be insecure about is their bodies but will distract from this by giving more to their lover, I’ve experienced their insecurities first hand and it can come across like they’re really giving lovers (true) but in that, it’s from their own sexual insecurities and perfection.
Help a virgo out by simply making them feel secure and even inviting them into sex by allowing them to watch you, if you’re into that. They appreciate a well kept body as they like neatness, so if this isn’t your thing then it might not be the best match. These can be very giving and that’s a real pro so enjoy it and don’t question it, they’ll open up in their own time.
Mars/Venus in Libra
These placements are very giving and appreciate aesthetics. They like balance, harmony, equality and peace in equal measure. They want to create balance in life and especially in the bedroom. Venus in libra will appreciate a partner who is this way inclined.
They can get really turned on by role playing, similar to the gemini, because it’s a sort of transformational, experimental but theatrical endeavour. Librans can be very picky in that they will appreciate fine surroundings and want things to be just right. For example, a mars in libra comment would be ‘I couldn’t get turned on in that bedroom’. Watching a porno they might even wonder where the nice lamp is from in the background!
All being well visually and a sense of venutian, finer setting these signs will be happy to explore and express sexually, after all it’s about partnership and equality, this they appreciate and will strive for.
Mars/Venus in Scorpio
These are intense, penetrating, danger seeking, deep lovers. They have tremendous endurance and like stability, security and danger in equal measure. Mars in scorpio is the long game. Calculated, focused, determined, penetrating and precise, all in the name of transforming and trascending. They generally seek intensity and deep intimacy in sex. It is not a thrown away sort of thing for scorpio energy.
They love breaking taboos and can often appear cold and aloof because there is SO MUCH going on underneath. With scorpio’s intensity you need to be equally as invested and open. You will know from thier eyes most of what is going on mentally for them, whether you love making is sweet or whether they want to take you down the road of filth, look to their eyes.
Their sexuality is very private even though their very energy is provocative and magnetic. They are drawn to quiet, subtle, deep, complex and complicated but not weak.
Scorpios are committed lovers generally, but look to other placements. Venus in scorpio are generally long enduring in relationship and attracted to that but mars in scorpio with a venus in gemini could be a totally different ballgame.
Keep it hot, deep, intense , real and primal but private.
Mars/Venus in Saggitarius
I mean.. think fun, adventure, risk and fire. One thing I will say is that venus in saggi like happy go lucky partners and tend to want to literally explore many relationships. They like to possess but not be possessed. They can be selfish lovers and tend to just want to ‘get off’ rather than give. It’s a bit like a sport to mars in saggi.
Turn on a mars in saggi by creating an adventurous date. Play games, but not complcated ones. Be open, honest and upfront but not long winded. Get to the act and get gone. No frills or heaviness and sometime no commitment is the sure fire way to get them going. Tricky ones these but definitely where you want to head if you like no frills, good time and fun in the bedroom.
Mars/Venus In Capricorn
Think Christian Gray or whatever his name is. Mars in cap loves to be authoritative, powerful and dominant in a very precise and steady way. They do appreciate simplicity and tradition BUT after a time they can bend this power and authority into things like tying up etc. They aren’t messy lovers and don’t share their sexcapades but there is a lot that will happen for sure. Don’t be fooled by how cappy lovers begin.
Venus in capricorn appreciate a lover who is authoritative and dominant with them BUT NOT disrepectful. Mars in capricorn wants to dominate so let them.
Don’t share any sex secrets of theirs, they’ll feel humiliated and this is an absolute deal breaker. Do not humiliate them sexually, you’ll be dead to them forever.
(my venus is in cap…. ha!)
Mars/Venus in Aquarius
I feel like these guys would be attracted to an alien.. or like the blue people of the avatar film! LOL! Anyway, venus in aqua people will appreciate an individual, creative, clever mind and be very drawn to anyone humanitarian or unique.
Mars in aqua people are maybe a little aloof with sex which could be make or break. They are definitely less warm or attached in sex or relationship and that can be great for the right sorts of people. They generally are turned on by the idea of sex and even can get involved in cyber sex, married people and affairs but not ones that have consequences. They are the type who if have other supportive placements can be polyamorous and thats cool if that’s your thing. They are great at sex or relationship from a distance. Do not try and constrain them, it will simply drive them mad.
Mars/Venus in Pisces
In my mind, mars can get a bit directionless here. I feel like mars the god of war has been put out at sea in a boat with no oars. It’s an interesting dynamic.
Venus here is exalted and this is a classic hopeless romantic dynamic. They can even be attracted to those downtrodden folk that they can save.
Pisces mars/venus will tend to be like chameleons and can literally shapeshift to fit the needs of the partner, whether it is actually helpful to them or not.
They appreciate spirituality and sex combined but be mindful they can be as easy come easy go as they like if they don’t have many supportive earth placements, which of course is fine if thats your sort of thing.
These slippery fishes appreciate a level of sweetness and hero/victim complex in equal measure. Is it real or not? Does it matter? They’ll make you feel amazing for the present moment it happens!
So what are your mars and venus placements and what have you experienced?